I recently came across this hilarious clip about the realities of parenting. People without kids have no idea what it’s truly like! Comedian Michael McIntyre does a fantastic job at accurately characterizing the parenting experience.
Today’s post might be off topic, but I will be sure to make mention of the Forces and their opinions about their dad sporting a Mo this November. I would be remiss for not posting something about my month long attempt at growing a mustache. This is my third kick at the can and each time I’ve grown out my sorry stache, it always seems to look more ridiculous than my previous attempts.
All that aside, I am proud to say that I’ve reached my fundraising goal of $500 all while helping to raise awareness around prostate cancer and men’s health in general.
The main downside (aside from the pathetic appearance of my stache) is that I’m beginning to notice a greater distance between my upper lip and the cheeks of my children. As of late, they’ve taken to cringing when dad hovers over to give them a good night kiss. “Dadda it’s itchy” or “Dadda I don’t like” it are commonly repeated. It will all be over in a few days, and as sure as I am that once it’s shaved it won’t be missed, I’m also sure that I’ll be doing it all over again next year for a good cause.
Oh yeah…feel free to donate @ http://mobro.co/alexcazzetta
In my previous post I commented on how older parents need to ensure they have the strength necessary to meet the physical demands of raising young children.
So for our daughter’s upcoming 6th birthday, we agreed to allow her to host her very own dance/karaoke party at our house. We knew that this would require a tremendous amount of strength on our end, but we decided to move ahead with the party anyway. We also realized that there was potential for minor chaos – after all we would be hosting a total of 8 girls under the age of 6 at our home. But nothing, I mean nothing, could have prepared us for the debauchery and mutiny that ensued.
As our guests arrived the decibel meter immediately reached a pitch of unprecedented levels. Eardrum piercing screeching persisted for the entire duration of the party. My wife and I were on the verge of losing our sanity as the minutes slowly crept on.
At one point I had to act as mediator over a dispute between the children. One lovely girl broke down in tears because during a game of charades she was accused of not being ‘pacific’ enough in what she thought was the acting out of a unicorn – the correct response was horse.
After resolving this particular dispute and the many that followed, we realized that we were running the serious risk of not having enough activities planned to keep the children adequately entertained. With about 30 minutes left we lost control of the situation, conceded defeat, and allowed the mutiny to take hold. We stood back and watched as the children did their best to tear down the house – luckily it was still standing by the time the parents arrived to pick-up their delightful children.
Next year, and for many years to come, there will be no house parties.
Oh the horror, the horror!
For today’s musings I feel that a change in perspective is needed. Perhaps I’ve been harping too much on the daily drudgeries that older parents face a bit too much. Maybe, just maybe, I’m over emphasizing the difficulties instead of focusing on the positives that come with being an over-the-hill parent.
I did a little poking about on the interweb to see what others out there have to say on the subject. One interesting statistic I came across in my search was in a piece by Janene Mascarella on parenting.com entitled The Benefits of Older Parents. She alerted me to the fact that “The U.S. birth rate hit its lowest level in decades. However, the only age group that showed an increase in birth rate was women 40 to 44.” Clearly there is a growing trend among us senior parents, which deserves further investigating but that is not purpose of this post.
The point Janene and I are trying to make is that “Age brings with it emotional stability, psychological strength, and financial security,” which makes individuals in their late 30’s or early 40’s perfectly predisposed to starting a family.
Getting out of the gate late isn’t always a bad thing, and this is especially true as it relates to becoming a parent. Blogger Joanna Montgomery backs me up in her in post, Five Big Perks of being an Older parent & Five Big Misses. Her top five perks include: emotional stability, intellectual maturity, financial health, taking less for granted, and my personal favourite – it keeps you young!
And yes, I know that she mentions five big misses, but I’m not talking about that here remember!? Read her post to find out more on what she considers misses. I have a list of my own that will likely form the basis of a future post.
She’s spot on with her five perks though. You’re likely to be more established from an emotional and economic perspective and have the mental capacity to better trudge through the daily battles of parenting – sorry was I being negative again?
In any case, I’ve never been more active in my life. Parenting can be invigorating and meeting the physical demands will force you to stay fit in order to keep up.
So there you have it, a post where I’m not griping (well not entirely) about my daily misadventures. Not sure I will be able to say the same come next time…so until then.
It’s 5 a.m. on Monday. You’re sound asleep. It was a busy weekend with all the Halloween activities and such. You’re dreaming peacefully about a 2016 Blue Jays World Series Championship win. And then it happens. You’re roused to your senses by the melodious sounds of a screaming 3 year-old child whose internal clock is not set to acknowledge the weekend time change. All parents have experienced this I’m sure. While everyone else (meaning everyone that doesn’t have young children) is enjoying that extra hour of much needed rest, you’re scrambling and fumbling to your feet in the dark, trying to figure out what the heck is going on!
The best part of the morning was not the fact that she was up before daybreak, but she was also extremely cranky and demanding. There is no way of appeasing a child in this state. This is one of those moments where negotiating is virtually impossible and going back to bed, plugging your ears and hiding under the covers is out of the question. Oh the drudgeries of life!
Thanks fowllanguagecomics.com for summarizing my day. I just hope that I can make it through the rest of it.
My children, AKA The Forces, are just learning math and numbers. Little do they know that dad is keeping stats on their daily activities. The below totals are subject to change depending on mood and cooperation level of The Forces.
8 – combined age of immovable forces. Although they are typically visible in their adorable shape and form, you should not be swayed by the dimples and freckles – I fall into this trap all the time. This is only a facade and part of their plan to further entrench themselves as a combined unconquerable force
15 – the number of minutes it takes to pick out and put on a pair of shoes in the morning (also applies to the length of time it may take to pick out/put on: socks, shirts, pants, jackets, etc.)
25 – body parts that are currently experiencing aches and pains as a result of carrying, playing and chasing the Forces around
0 – number of times the Forces do what they’re told the first time they’re asked
2 – minutes that mom and dad have to eat their breakfast in the morning, while running around trying to the get the Forces ready for school
10-12 – total number of tantrums, tirades, unprovoked outbursts and semi-violent attacks that can occur on a given day
5 – average number of bedtime hugs and kisses that help make the days’ worries disappear